Thousands call for Jeff Bezos to be denied re-entry to Earth after space launch

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Don’t let the rocket hatch hit you where the good lord split you, Jeff Bezos!

That’s the message from the 10,000 — and counting — haters who’ve signed a petition calling for the billionaire founder and former CEO to be denied re-entry to Earth following his upcoming space launch on July 20, according to

Bezos, the world’s second richest man with a net worth of approximately $186 billion, “is actually Lex Luthor,” the petition alleges. “He’s actually an evil overlord hellbent on global domination. We’ve known this for years.”

The author of the petition also claims that Bezos, 57, has “worked with the Epsteins and the Knights Templar, as well as the Free Masons to gain control over the whole world.”

“Meanwhile our government stands by and lets it happen,” they conclude. “This may be our last chance before they enable the 5G microchips and perform a mass takeover.”

The move comes as space cases have bid tens of millions of dollars to fly with the wildly successful entrepreneur, alongside younger brother Mark Bezos, 53, a marketing executive and former firefighter.

The internet has enjoyed a field day of jokes as Bezos prepares for his cosmic tour, which will see the amateur astronaut penetrating the atmosphere in a “giant penis,” according to some jokesters, erected by Bezos’ aerospace manufacturer Blue Origin.

Meanwhile, ex-wife MacKenzie Scott, 51, announced last week that, since her divorce with the billionaire, she’s donated nearly $3 billion in alimony to hundreds of charities, including issues of racial justice.

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