The Christmas holiday might not often often see us with a lot of time on our hands but, as we’re all well aware, this year is a bit different.
Between being off work and the atypical lack of social gatherings taking place this year, we could easily find ourselves twiddling our thumbs.
If that sounds like you and your partner, then never fear, because we’ve got some sexy suggestions for how you can kill the time this holiday.
The gingerbread man
Christmas and gingerbread houses are a classic combination, so why not pay homage to the sweet treat in the bedroom?
All this sex position requires is for the penetrator to stand with their arms down and hovering a few inches away from their hips.
They then need to stand very still while their partner does all the work – gingerbread men don’t move after all.
Pigs in blankets
‘There is nothing worse than feeling so full from Christmas dinner that you could burst, but also a little turned on,’ experts at Datingroo said.
‘Go full pigs in blankets, curling up on the sofa for the laziest but sexiest slow f**k of your life.
‘Adopt a simple spooning position under your best Christmas blanket – that’s one way to start working off those Christmas dinner calories…’
This one’s for masturbators with a penis.
If you fancy a bit of solo self-care this Christmas, then why not draw yourself a nice warm bath?
Once you’re in, pleasure yourself until completion and watch the, erm, new addition to the bath dance under the water like a shaken snowglobe.
When you’re done watching that visual spectacle, consider taking a shower.
Baste the turkey
Datingroo experts say: ‘Don’t let the turkey have all the fun, get all oiled up with your favourite lube for a slippy and sensual time.
‘To make things interesting, pick out your favourite scented lubes or edible body paint to make it even tastier.
‘Who needs Christmas pudding? This is a much more fun dessert.’
This one is for anyone in a bigger and sexually free houseshare – at least for now.
To do it, you need to get as many willing participants as you can while keeping to the rules of your tier.
Everyone but one person should get on their hands and knees in a single row, with each person giving the one in front either cunnilingus – or analingus – from behind.
The one person left standing should position themselves at the back, penetrating the last person in the row from behind.
For extra festive fun, the person in the back can bring a whip into the mix.
‘Why not get a little distracted whilst wrapping the presents this year?’ the Datingroo experts said.
‘Tying each other up with some festive ribbon for some safe and sexy play.
‘Although we recommend you keep clear of the sellotape if you wanna keep your hair.’
The Christmas Pud
Ever noticed the breast-like shape of traditional Christmas puddings, especially when there’s a wee berry on top?
With that in mind, if you’d like to try a new way to ice your Christmas pud, you can end your next sexual encounter by having a partner with breasts lie on their back.
Then, the other partner should ejaculate on top of one of their breasts, being careful to aim for the middle as much as they can.
It’s good form to make sure the one on their back has already come before this happens. After all, desert always comes last, right?
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