'Right-handed man' almost masturbates to death: medical case study

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This fellow redefined “mind-blowing sex” after he suffered a life-threatening stroke while repeatedly masturbating. Now, medical experts are saying he’s lucky he escaped the ultimate unhappy ending.

The unnamed “51-year-old right-handed man” from Japan admittedly enjoyed pleasuring himself several times a day, according to the new case study published in the medical Journal Of Stroke and Cerebrovascular Diseases.

However, one explosive self-love session went awry when, after climaxing, the serial stroker was struck down by “thunderclap” headaches and severe vomiting.

Unnerved by the unsexy symptoms, the man rushed himself to Nagoya City University Hospital, where he was found to have low blood pressure and confusion: two telltale signs of a cerebrovascular accident, according the medical case study.

Emergency medical technicians suspected he had a stroke while stroking — and a subsequent CT scan confirmed that the man had indeed suffered a subarachnoid hemorrhage (SAH), a potentially fatal type of stroke sparked by ruptured blood vessels in the space surrounding the brain.

Prior case studies have reported that sex — including the autoerotic variety — “was the immediate preceding activity before a ruptured aneurysm in up to 14 percent of patients,” according to clinical neuropsychologist Dr. Aimee Baird, author of “Sex in the Brain: How Your Brain Controls Your Sex Life” (Columbia University Press, 2020). The risk of death by sex-induced stroke can be compounded by taking cocaine or viagra before the act.

Alas, the man survived his near-fatal orgasm ordeal and was released from the hospital within two weeks in excellent condition, according to doctors.

However, he should thank his lucky stars he didn’t achieve the opposite of a happy ending, as a ruptured brain aneurysm causes “death in 40 percent of cases,” Dr. Baird reported. Meanwhile, two-thirds of survivors are left with a serious neurological deficit.

This isn’t the first time someone has suffered a vascular mishap during an act of self-gratification. In 2016, a Bronx hospital worker allegedly died of a heart attack while masturbating to porn at work, according to police sources.

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