DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my partner visits his kids he completely ignores me.
He won’t even text just in case they see, because he and his ex haven’t told them they’re separated.
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They claim it’s because they want to protect them.
But how are we meant to have a proper relationship when his kids don’t know I exist?
I’m 36 and my partner’s 38. His children are 11 and 13.
My partner won’t take calls from me at his ex’s house as he thinks this would be disrespectful – but where’s the respect for me?
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My family are always asking about him and our future.
But when I don’t have the answers, it makes me feel rubbish.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Introducing children to a new partner can be tricky, but if he wants a future with you then surely he knows he can’t keep you a secret.
Perhaps he’s worried his ex would cause trouble if she knew more about you and make it difficult for him to see his children.
You do not say how long you have been together but tell him you want to talk about your future.
Explain you want to know where your relationship is going and to meet his children.
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Set a timeline, perhaps six months.
If nothing changes, you may have to consider moving on.
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