DEAR DEIDRE: I AM madly in love with my girlfriend but we have one big problem – she constantly stalks her ex.
It is three years since we first met and we started a relationship six months later.
She is 26 and I am 25. She and her ex were an item for just a few months.
Then she found out he was married.
He treated her like rubbish and used her to fund his drugs habit.
She knows exactly what he is but behind my back she checks up on him several times a week. She swears she has no feelings for him but her actions say different.
I love her but does she love me? Or is it still him?
DEIDRE SAYS: By checking up on her ex, she has seems to have unresolved feelings about him – but they are not necessarily positive. His bad treatment towards her may have felt familiar from early experiences and right now she is stuck in the past.
But she knows her behaviour bothers you and she is not respecting your relationship by going behind your back.
Give her an ultimatum that either she moves on or she risks you doing so.
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