I feel like a failure because I can't get my wife pregnant after years of trying

DEAR DEIDRE:  I FEEL like I have let everyone down because I cannot get my wife pregnant.

We have been trying for years.

I have had tests and know I am infertile so my wife has been having IVF treatment using a donor.

It looks like our final chance has failed and we cannot afford to pay to continue. I am 44, my wife is 39.

She is trying to be brave and not worry me but I keep finding her crying.

All she wants is a baby and I feel such a failure for not being able to do this for her.

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DEIDRE SAYS: You’ve not let anyone down but nature has not been kind to you. You are not a failure, just human.

Infertility is extremely painful emotionally but you are no more to blame than someone who is short-sighted.

Fertility problems can drive a wedge between couples but I bet your wife loves you and values you as more than just a sperm provider.

Share your feelings and you can both find understanding through Fertility Network UK, who support the involuntarily childless. See fertilitynetworkuk.org.

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